Friday, January 13, 2006

Mr. Crankypants returns!

If the tags are designated “Farm Truck”, keep it on the FARM! Not taking up two spaces in the already cramped parking lot. That “Dooley” may provide you with the hauling and towing capacity you need at the ranch, but you ain’t on the ranch, sister. Mmmkay?
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I know if, when I’m merging at full speed, you were to, you know, LET ME MERGE, that it would somehow diminish your manhood. As if somehow, just easing off the gas, would be conceding defeat. Or moving one lane to the left would mean the terrorists have won. But do you really have to speed up to keep me from sliding in ahead of you? This ain’t NASCAR, you ain’t Richard Petty, and we ain’t racing. Comprende?
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If I would have WANTED to have my checking and savings done at a bank, I would have SIGNED UP AT A BANK. But I didn’t, so I didn’t. Thanks so much for telling me you know better and changing your credit union charter to a banking charter. I’m sure it was strictly for my benefit and not so the board of directors could line their pockets with all sorts of dividends, stock options, perks and graft. Of course, you couldn’t have done it if you hadn’t convinced my credit union co-members to vote it in. Suckers. Just wait ‘til the corporate suits start slashing benefits to put more on the bottom line. Then again, I could just be very cynical. Or very good at pattern recognition. At least it’s not “for the children”.
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Witnessed the epitome of “hard sell” at lunch today. While cruising through the aisles at Sam’s, a mother was trying to convince her 3 year old that soft drinks, referred to as “bubbles”, didn’t taste good and were bad for you. The kid wasn’t buying. Smart kid. And for the record, I can give up my three-coke-a-day habit AN-E-TIME I want to. No, really.

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Ok, I'm back from the breakroom. Aaahhhhh.
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The Dell Customer Service guy was very helpful once I finally got him. Steve, he said his name was. And he sounded pretty normal. But the longer we talked, the more accent appeared. Communication actually became easier when I realized he was probably in India. I could allow for the one to two second delay at the end of sentences and not talk over him. It took forever, but the problem was solved to my, and more importantly, the EAC’s, satisfaction, since it was her computer. Steve sent me a follow-up email. And signed it Samaraji, or some such. Hey, close enough. Thanks Steve!
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Wait! How did that last one get in there? Dang it! Now the whole post is just ruined.

Shoot.

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