Wednesday, September 14, 2005

Adventures in copying

Terry's not the only one who knows how to run a copy machine, you know.

So, Friday, I'm in the middle of a large copy job (4 sets of 200 pages, single sided to double sided, on colored paper), when the copier stops. Needs toner. No problem, I'm sure we have toner around here somewhere.

Foolish mortal.

Call the copier people and they say they'll gladly ship me toner. To arrive on Monday. I need toner right now, not on Monday. So on a long shot, I start looking online. Staple's web site has the toner I need. But do the stores carry it, or is it a special order? Call up the closest store.

Me: I'm looking for toner for a Canon ... blah, blah, blah. I looked it up on your website and the product number is ... blah, blah blah. Do you have that?

Store guy: Uh. Hold on.

Me: (Rocking to the hold music)

Bossman: (walking by) !!!

Me: (Shrug)

Store guy: Uh. Could you give me that copier model again?

Me: Sure. It's a Canon ... blah, blah, blah.

Store guy: Ok. Hang on.

Me: (Eyes glazing, drool beginning to form, confidence waning with every passing second)

Store guy: We've got 'em. I'm looking at two right now.

Me: Put one aside, I'm on my way right now.

Arrive at store 10 minutes later. Track down store guy.

Store guy:'re going to be mad at me...

No, not mad. But not surprised either. I tell store guy what I need. Again. He looks at me like a chicken watching a card trick. I suggest we go to HIS computer and look it up on HIS web site. We do so.

Store guy: Oh. I've never seen anything like that. We'd have to order it.


Me: Okay, thanks anyway.

Store guy: ...

Call the office. Talk to bossman. Get phone number for copier people. Attempt to cradle phone and write number on tiny yellow sticky. Call the copier people. Can I pick up toner? Why sure. Where are they located? An hour away. Call bossman back for further input. Decide it's best just to go back to office. Call copier people. Again. Tell them I'm NOT coming to pick up toner, but I DO want it shipped. Back at office, bossman wants me to call other copier places. Call other copier places. They can all order it, but don't stock it. Refer me to copier people we already deal with. Waive white flag. Go to lunch.

Guess what I get to do today???

MORE copying! Wheee!!!

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