Monday, February 28, 2005

Dueling Chuck, Dueling Arnold

Some odd TV scheduling yesterday.

So, while I was flipping around waiting for the California 500 to start, I came across an infomercial with Chuck Norris. Another channel was showing Missing in Action.

Then last night I had my choice of The Eraser or Collateral Damage. (It’s not like there was ANYTHING else on – worth watching anyway).

I must have missed the announcement that it was Action Hero Sunday.

(I would have worn my special underpants!)

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    How RUDE!!!

    Mrs. A and the EAC came home from prom-dress shopping on Saturday and mentioned that they had seen some funny T-Shirts at a mall kiosk.

    “I’m not trying to hurt your feelings,” Mrs. A says, “but this one shirt made us think of you.”

    “I’ve got the bod of a god…unfortunately it’s Buddha.”

    Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha … HEY!

    (I wonder if that comes in a 2X?)

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    Irony lost

    I don’t know. Maybe it’s just me. But something seems squirrelly when you pay a company six figures to tell you how to save five.

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    Wednesday, February 23, 2005

    Lord I'm one, Lord I'm two, Lord I'm three, Lord I'm four

    I'm 500 miles away from home. At least I was this past weekend. (Glenn Campbell, anyone?? Anyone?? Right! Well, moving on...)

    Haven't been to see my Dad for quite some time (something related to eating regularly has gotten in the way. And I do like to eat regularly), but I finally was able to pick the lock on the ankle fetter attached to my desk and managed to slip away for an extended weekend. My Dad is still plugging away and his condition has not changed dramatically since the last time I was there.

    One thing that DID change is that he now takes his pain meds the way they're SUPPOSED to be taken, instead of waiting until the pain gets too bad for him to tolerate. This is the man who until a year ago took a "pain pill" (Advil, aspirin or Tylenol - which I guess is technically correct, but not the Demerol, Darvocet, Tylenol III or Percodan that typically come to mind when you say those words) about once a year if it was a particularly bad year - and then only one pill, not two (or three or four like some folks have to). Now he has the real deal for pain meds and has decided it's a GOOD thing to take them as prescribed. And they say old dogs can't learn new tricks.

    He still hasn't learned to play UNO, though. Oh, don't get me wrong, he CLAIMS to know how to play, but I always have to give him a refresher "lesson" or two when I'm there. Of course, HE'LL claim that HE'S the one giving me lessons...

    The last time I was there, they had modernized their entertainment center to include a DVD player. The old TV remote was on its last legs and so a trip to Wal-Mart later we had a new remote that would run the TV, VCR and the DVD!!!! (What'll they think of next!?!) I had to show him which buttons to push and in which order, but he didn't have too much trouble 'cause the new remote was layed out very similar to the old one. He did like the fact that he could run everything without digging out another remote.

    One of the DVDs we watched had a bunch of old Beverly Hillbilly's episodes. Let's just say that I was particularly amused by this episode which has a secondary story line featuring the celebration of Possum Day, complete with a Possum Day parade and possum jugglers (who could juggle three possums while a fourth sat on their head and waved an American flag).

    I wonder if they celebrate that in Alabama? And if so, on what day? Hmmm...who could I ask?

    Nope. Can't think of a single person.

    'Cept maybe this guy, but what does HE know about possums?

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    Wednesday, February 16, 2005

    In praise of older women

    Happy birthday to you,
    Happy birthday to you.
    Happy birthday Mrs. A,
    Happy birthday to you!

    Now, where's the cake?

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    Friday, February 11, 2005

    In order to serve me better, or not

    Well, I just discovered a NEW feature of Bloooger that they've added this last week.

    I like a little separation between the last line of my posts and the by-line. So I normally add a blank line to the bottom of my posts. When Bloooger added the WYSIWYG "Compose" option, if I added a blank line to the bottom, it was ignored. BUT, you could still use the "Edit HTML" screen to add the blank line.

    I noticed today that the blank line is now ignored even in the "Edit HTML" screen. Wow, thanks Bloooger, you gave me another new feature I didn't even want. (Good thing the price is right, eh?)

    So, how did I get the blank line to appear at the bottom?
    I just added a letter ('a' usually) and changed the text to white.

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    My, my...where DOES the time go?

    I've been dealing with a rent-a-boss for a couple of weeks now. He's an ok guy with a lot of great ideas on how to change and improve things. Except he was told when he was hired that he wasn't here to change or improve things, just maintain the status quo.

    He's not the type to let a little thing like that get in his way.

    Anyway, he's had me jumping through hoops getting ready for a presentation to the Executive Committee. Did I mention that Aardvarks aren't known for their jumping abilities?

    The changes he's had me make are all good ones. My only, well ok, not ONLY, (but biggest will work) complaint is that he is so focused on presentation that he has overlooked the data. I don't care how pretty it looks, if the information in the presentation is wrong, you don't get any credit for style.

    So yesterday, we're in a first-pass/dry-run with the owners, and we get to the meat of the data and he says, "Well, I really haven't audited this yet, so the information may change." Grrrr. GRRRRRR. GRRRRRRRRR!!! (My co-workers have the same complaint, so it's not just me.)

    I figured out last night what he's doing. He's converting everything we produce into the formats HE'S comfortable and familiar with. That makes his job easier. And ours harder. And because he doesn't want to dig in to what we normally produce, he wants everything changed NOW, not later. So instead of saying, "This is fine for this time, but the next time you produce this report, change this, this and this," he says, "Change this, this and this. We shouldn't be producing reports this way."

    Let's just say it's not a big morale boost to hear that EVERYTHING that everyone is doing is all wrong. Maintain the status quo. Heh. Indeed. (Thanks Dr. Reynolds)

    Anyway, I think he's about done changing everything I do, so things should start settling down.

    No, really. This time I mean it.

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    We interrupt this program to bring you this important announcement:

    Someone is having a blog birthday today. (Followed in short-order by the real thing on Wednesday)

    And let me tell you, she's a cute 1-year-old.

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    Friday, February 04, 2005

    My night to howl

    Or whoofle, or snort, or grunt, or whatever it is that Aardvarks do - was scheduled for tonight. The Big Dog and I were going to go paint the town red. Of course, over the last few years the shade of red keeps getting paler and paler. I think at our rowdiest we barely qualify for pastel pink. Our old hangout has live music on the weekends, but it doesn't start until 10 PM. We used to get there early (before they start collecting the cover charge), eat dinner, shoot some pool and hang out through at least the first set of whatever band was playing. Nowadays, we get there early, eat dinner, talk for a while, debate going to a movie, and usually pull the plug about 8 or 8:30. We're wild men, I tell you.

    Anyway, since I was working so much, it's been quite a while since we've had a boy's night out. And it will have to wait another week.

    As you can read about here, Mrs. A was going to treat herself to the Stubbs exhibit at the Kimball today. Until the EAC took ill. Of course, her Mom genes kicked into high gear and now she just "can't" go. She doesn't want to leave the EAC home alone while she's sick. So, the NEW plan is that I'm going to come home this evening and TAKE her to the Kimball. We can leave the YAC there to keep an eye on her sister, and we'll get some time alone to do something that's near the top of Mrs. A's list - looking at horses. (My list has something else at or near the top, as Mrs. A well knows, but the two MAY turn out to be related. Or not.) I've already called the Big Dog and he's ok with postponing until next week.

    Plus it gives me another reason why I can't work late. And I'll still be home before 9.

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    Wednesday, February 02, 2005


    THAT was certainly an interesting call.

    Mrs. A called a minute ago. Which is not in and of itself too surprising, since we do routinely touch base several times a day. (Uhn...heh-heh...he said "touch base." Heh-heh.) What WAS unusual was the subject matter.

    The EAC has a classmate that is a foreign exchange student (from one of the 'Stans - Kyrgyzstan we think) and we heard last week she was going to have to change schools. Come to find out, it's because the family that had been sponsoring her will no longer be able to.

    And she's in need of a sponsor.

    You see where I'm going here?

    I told Mrs. A to get as much information as she could about what is involved and then we could talk to the kids and see if it's something we can do.

    (Mrs. A is determined to get the spare room cleaned out one way or another!



    Just kidding, honey.


    No, really. Put down that frying pan!)

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    Tuesday, February 01, 2005

    Oh, yeah

    Sorry for the lack of blather the last few just been like that around here.

    Frying pan|fire


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    Statistical observation

    Would it be fair to say that the Michael Jackson supporters standing outside the courthouse should be considered as being more than one standard deviation outside the norm?

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