Wednesday, October 27, 2004

All Points Bulletin

Reported Missing: Tuesday.

Last seen in the vicinity of Monday. Reported to be carrying a full 24 hours and not afraid to use them.

Bystanders reported Tuesday to be jittery and nervous, jumping from minute to minute while muttering something about “cupcakes.”

Approach with caution – extreme flight risk – may be gone before you realize.

Anyone spotting Tuesday should notify the authorities immediately.

Even though Tuesday can have a gentle, reassuring “Hey, I’m not Monday” appearance, Tuesday can become nasty and bitter without warning. Tuesday should be considered extremely hostile. Citizens are urged NOT to attempt to negotiate or capture Tuesday on their own. Citizens attempting to take matters into their own hands may find themselves waking up Wednesday with no recollection of their encounter with Tuesday.

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